What Mothers Need

I told my online friend “Shelly” in San Diego about the unimplemented policy of former conservative and Catholic Austalian Prime Minister Tony Abbott. to fund much better paid parental leave for new mothers by a levy on the biggest companies in Australia.

Shelly commented:

” Mothers and their needs are often ignored by society. 

Most conservatives would agree that the family is the building block of a free society. Anything that strengthens family, such as allowing new parents more time to bond with their children, strengthens the civil society which acts as a bulwark against tyranny. But good luck getting Americans to see that.

in America it’s the Republicans who would be most opposed to reforms like Abbott’s proposal because any suggestion of new taxes, corporate or individual, is DOA with GOP voters and any mention of increased paid leave of any kind is (wrongly) labeled “socialism”.

America has become very confused about what socialism is.

The right throws the term “socialism” around like the left throws “racism” around. Both now apparently mean anything the speaker doesn’t like, which just trivializes both terms. If everything is racist/socialist then nothing is. Ideologies which have killed millions should not be trivialized.

American hospitals used to allow new mothers to stay overnight or longer to make sure both mother and baby were fit to return home. By the time my mother had me (30 years ago) it was a few hours. By the time my mom had my brother (24 years ago) they pretty much rushed her out of the hospital as soon as my brother was born.

Very dehumanizing.

I don’t know how it is in Australia, but the American health care system treats each patient as a number, rather than as an individual. Like restaurants they want you out as soon as possible to make room for the next “customers”.

That kind of attitude, coupled with relatively high maternal mortality rates in the US, is one of many reasons why Millennial women are turning away from motherhood.”

As a man who was a midwife in Australia for 32 years, I say,

“God Bless You, Shelly,  for your very modern honesty.

I hope your future holds as much or as little motherhood as you need.”

Geoff Fox, Mothers’ Day, 2020, Down Under

 

REMEMBERING MY MIDWIFERY

Today is Karl Marx’s birthday.

He was a guy who was supposed to be pro-worker but whose thinking has constantly lead to totalitarian tyranny.

Including for me.

I was a midwife in Australia for 30 years.

It was a wonderful way to earn a living. Working with couples (and single mums) as they built families.

But it didn’t survive this modern age of Phlegminism.

The destruction of this part of my life happened in the state of Victoria under the government of Socialist Left leader Daniel Andrews. A man who supports feminism but has shown me that he doesn’t care about mothers at all.

The foundations of the modern Third Wave of Feminism are like Marxism.

Both depend on victimhood. According to Marxism, as I understand it, workers are inevitably the victims of rich people and in feminism women are the victims of men. This has nothing to do with healthy social reality.

In the real world, in free civilised societies, people benefit by being decent to each other because they need each other.

They can build good lives together based on love and understanding if they are free.

This is becoming harder and harder in The West for both genders.

I think most men and women are good people, but in the modern world they are so often lost and confused; family life suffers badly as a result.

“Shelly” of San Diego writes:

“Millennial women are turning away from motherhood.

Mothers and their needs are often ignored by society.

For me, being married to a Taiwanese man is different than being with an American man in many different ways. 

Nowadays many American men expect sex by the third date and refuse to commit.

I understand that sex is important to men but putting an arbitrary number on it just kills it for me. I’m a human being, not a trained seal who performs on command. My husband was content to let things unfold at a pace that was comfortable for me. At the same time many American men refuse to commit and call a woman who wants marriage rather than a hookup “pushy”.

Whereas my husband proposed to me after 10 months of dating.”

Isn’t that beautiful?

Geoff Fox, 5th May, (a.k.a. International Midwives’ Day), 2020, Down Under

I WILL TELL MY STORY #2

What is next for this sadly misguided, tragically panicked modern world?

The West cannot go back to all of the old practices of a traditional, family based culture where most women were stay at home mothers and most men went out to work.

Too many women have completed long formal educations, entered careers and established themselves there. No one (except, perhaps, her doctor) can successfully tell Ruth Bader-Ginsburg to give up her job and stay at home, no matter how much her brand of allegedly “progressive” liberalism trashes the conservative world.

We all have to accept the reality of how much the Western World has changed.

Only then can we accurately assess which of the damaging changes can actually be rolled back.

Here my personal story is unique and may allow me to contribute to a much needed debate.

I have been a midwife over three decades of my adult life.

A male midwife.

At times it has been very challenging to be in a traditionally female role, but most of the time it was wonderful.

I was paid for being a part of the lives of mothers and their families when new babies are born. Very few men ever get better working lives than that.

But my status as a midwife has not survived the very many stupidities of modern feminist misandry and modern feminist misogyny.

No matter what man hating, mother hating feminists might say, when seeking gender equality for themselves but not for others, being a mother is profoundly different to being a father.

Gender equality in many things is OK.

But it would be absurd to say that gender equality exists in carrying life in the womb, in giving birth to that life and in breast feeding.

Any society, or species, which does not see accurately and protect its own processes of procreation cannot survive. And probably does not deserve to survive.

This is a motherhood issue.

Far too much of third wave feminism is the enemy of mothers and therefore the enemy of us.

When very conservative, devout Catholic Australian Prime Minister Tony Abbott wanted to tax the biggest companies in Australia to fund much more generous paid parental leave for new mothers, his courageous, ground breaking policy was dismissed as a “Rolls Royce” scheme by the feminist friendly Left.

The PC idiots treat the needs of mothers as luxuries.

They labelled Tony Abbott a misogynist and that label was a huge factor in destroying his prime ministership.

There is much to learn from this episode in Australian political history.

It was destructive anti-mother feminism at its worst. (I say that as a man who was a proud Australian midwife at the time.)

Now I thank God that I was able to work with mothers and their families for so long.

I salute Tony Abbott for the political courage he showed in standing up for a better deal for mothers.

And I hate the sick, modern feminism which hates mums.

Geoff Fox, 23rd March, 2020, Down Under

Socialist Daniel Andrews Channels Donald Trump

Let me be upfront and disclose my personal history with Daniel Andrews, premier of the Australian state of Victoria.

I met the man once.

I talked to him from the heart about breast feeding.

This is what the prefeminist era used to call a motherhood issue.

It was on the steps of the state parliament in Melbourne. He listened as I told him that I had been a midwife for a quarter of a century and that I felt really strongly about the need to improve breast feeding rates. For public health. For mums. For families. For babies.

Without any reaction at all, Daniel Andrews turned his back on me and walked away.

A few years later, his government’s state police force arrested me as a result of my memorial tree planting lobbying of an elected local government politician from Daniel Andrews’ political party.

Daniel Andrews has history with me. It is not good. I dont like him.

But it does give me great pleasure to point out that, in his response to the coronavirus pandemic, Socialist Left factionalist Andrews has quickly followed in the footsteps of master politician Donald Trump by declaring a state of emergency.

As we face this crisis, without the public health benefits of good breast feeding rates, nobody knows yet what new strategies will work best.

Perhaps the apparent British approach, lead by Boris Johnson, of welcoming the acheivement of herd immunity, would give better longterm protection, if a much more virulent, more deadly strain of this virus emerges later.

Who really knows?

Only God is omniscient.

The Daniel Andrews I have met knows nothing of public health.

And didnt even care.

Geoff Fox, 17th March, 2020, Down Under

Mourning My Midwifery

From a career point of view I now have little to show for the three decades I spent as a midwife in Australia. That time came to an end because of two factors. First, there was the largely undebated destruction in the age of feminism of the publicly funded lying in period for new mothers; it wasnt undebated by me. Secondly an attack on me by a “progressive” politician misusing the police severely damaged my capacity to function as an Australian. I am still recovering, still in a state of shock;

Miwifery taught me much about the astonishing beauty of life when men and women combine in care of the newborn.

Why have western societies forgotten that?

Geoff Fox, 10th February, 2020, Terra Nullius

Tony Abbottt’s Tragic Mistake – Is this a Lesson for ScoMo?

Today is my last day as a Registered Midwife in Australia. Cutbacks in services to mothers and a personally debilitating attack on my human rights from within the ALP in Maribyrnong have combined to deprive me of this livelihood.

I am proud of the unique knowledge midwifery has given me of what women, men and children need.

Today my midiwfery registration expires. So this is my last chance to put on record as a midwife that I know of no other politician in Australia’s history who stood up for what Australian mothers really need as well as opposition leader Tony Abbott did with his courageous policy of a Paid Parental Leave (PPL) scheme funded by taxing big companies. At that time, as I recall, whenever I googled “ALP breast feeding policy”, I came up with policy relating to feeding lots for cattle.

Postponing the implementation of his truly great PPL scheme to the third year of his government’s three year term was a tragic mistake.

By the time that third year arrived, relentless attacks on his alleged misogyny had eaten up the massive political capital he had in his first year.

So feminist and conservative attacks on Mr Abbott’s proposed PPL contributed to Australian mums losing a great chance to get a huge part of the support they need to increase their chances of breast feeding longer.

There is a lesson here for reelected Prime Minister Scott Morrison: he should not wait till the third year of the normal parliamentary term to do things for which he has a clear mandate now.

Freedom of Speech.

Freedom of Religion.

We need both these fundamental rights protected now.

In his maiden speech to parliament in 2008, ScoMo said “Australia is not a secular country — it is a free country.” With passing time these wise words are less clearly true.

Good on you, ScoMo, for saving Australia’s national government from the human rights catastrophe of Maribyrnong Bill.

Please protect our freedoms soon.

Geoff Fox, Maribyrnong, May 31, 2019

Gender And Society: Calling Out Hysteria

 

This is what I believe and what I need to say and discuss to survive:

 

1. Men, women and children need to live with love.

This love is an indispensable foundation of human society.

 

2. Three fundamental mothering capacities differentiate women from men:

A The ability to carry and nurture life in the womb.

B The capacity to give birth to that life.

C The ability to give the best possible nutrition to new human beings by breast feeding.

 

3 These three qualitative differences give mothers and potential mothers some different human rights and responsibilities to the rights and responsibilities of other people.

 

4 The modern western demonisation of men and disempowerment of mothers are two sides of the same coin.

 

5 The cradle of human culture is maternal love.

 

6 True loving manliness empowers and protects mums.

 

7 When family life ceases to be a nation’s foundation, the nation’s death is inevitable.

 

Geoff Fox, Rembang, Jawa Tengah, Indonesia, 31st August 2018

SOME QUESTIONS FOR MOTHERS DAY FROM A VICTORIAN MIDWIFE.

I have been a midwife in Australia for 30 years.

I believe that human babies have a right to human milk.

Who agrees with me?

6 months exclusive breast feeding is the recommended minimum. According to the latest publicly available comprehensive figures, 96% of Australian mothers initiate breast feeding for their newborns. At 5 months only 15% have been exclusively breast fed for that time. To achieve better breast feeding rates, mothers need more support.

The Victorian Charter of Human Rights and Responsibilities states: “Every child has the right, without discrimination, to such protection as is in his or her best interests and is needed by him or her by reason of being a child.”

The first few days are crucial to establishing breast feeding.

Since breast feeding is unarguably the best foundation for a baby’s life long physical, psychological and social health, why have successive Victorian governments whittled away at the publicly funded lying in period spent among midwives for new mothers?

When I became a midwife in the late 1980’s, we were very reluctant to send a breast feeding woman home if the milk supply was not established. Sometimes that could mean midwifery care in hospital for a week. Most mothers stayed for three to five days.

Since then the Baby Friendly Hospital Initiative made Victorian hospitals much better places to establish breast feeding than they were. But the question, “Is the milk in yet?” has been replaced in public hospitals by the question “How soon do you want to go home?” The common length of stay is one to three days or earlier if the mother wants. For some women going home quickly is highly desirable and not a problem at all. But for others, undisturbed bonding with the baby under the care of experts in breast feeding is a need that it is impossible to meet at home.

Why have women and their newborn babies been denied the right to a publicly funded lying-in period to establish breast feeding?

I believe this has happened because it is cheaper for new mothers to be sent home quickly than it is to care for them.

Earlier this decade, I told Labor Health Minister, Nicola Roxon, that I believed new mothers were being sent home too quickly. Her immediate response was to ask what impact would that have on breast feeding rates. She promised to discuss my concerns with me, but did not deliver on the promise till she became Attorney General: she knew there was a problem but she didn’t make the time to listen to me when it counted.

At that time if you googled “Liberal Party breast feeding” Tony Abbot’s generous paid parental scheme was what you found: this policy would have helped breast feeding rates; he clearly did care. Who cares now?

If you googled  ”Labor Party breast feeding” the result was policies about cattle feedlots.

Australia’s latest national comprehensive breast feeding figures are from 2010.

Share market prices can be dealt with in seconds or even milli-seconds.

Who wants a better balance between our attention to our breast feeding rates and our attention to stock prices? I know I do.

Why don’t we have regular updates on breast feeding rates?

Is there a single candidate running in this year’s Victorian state election who cares about breast feeding and who will push for better midwifery postnatal services and the return of a publicly funded lying-in period available to all mothers?

https://www.facebook.com/groups/breastfeedingsupportinvictoria/?ref=group_browse_new was my attempt to raise awareness prior to the previous election. Who wants to revive this effort?

Mothers want to give their babies the best.

But they need more support.

Who else cares about this?

Societies which neglect the needs of mothers and their babies cannot survive.

Geoff Fox, Midwife. 08-05-2018.